My Cup Is Half Full.. Not Half Empty

This article is written by my husband, Leland Pulley. It is from the 11/2008 Newsletter  we do together. It is as important today as it was last year. Hope it uplifts your spirits!

My Cup Is Half Full, Not Half Empty

November is the month of Thanksgiving. It is a season to be grateful for the benefits and blessings that each of us have in life. It should be a time to slow down and reflect upon our lives, and what is going on in them.

My life has its ups and downs like most other people. There are things that are going well and things not going so well. There are things that have worked out for the best, as well as past mistakes that still affect me today. But the main issue here is not getting everything I want or having everything my way. It is to deal with the situations I face and the circumstances I live in, and make the best of both. How well I can do this is greatly affected by my attitude towards life itself and my ability to deal with it.

I like you do not get any benefit out of looking at things from the negative or pessimistic viewpoint. This doesn’t make anyone happy, nor create more solutions for problems, nor lead to more cooperation between people. This is what I mean by “my cup is not half empty”. In contrast “my cup is half full”. I choose to look at things from the positive or optimistic viewpoint. This makes me happier. I’m more creative in addressing problems, and have more energy to overcome obstacles in my way. This positive perspective helps me to get along better with others and be more of service to them. I feel good and have better mental health. There is more joy to life with a cup that is half full.

What I have said may sound obvious and easy. You may ask, why doesn’t everyone do this? There are many answers to this question, ranging from ignorance, to lack of hope, to being overwhelmed, to lack of a support group, to limited opportunities. But to get more personal, ask yourself, do you view your cup as half full? Do you think this way? Do you feel things this way? Do you approach daily living this way? Review your daily routines, your responsibilities, and your relationships with others. Then evaluate which attitude is predominant most of the time. Is it the more problematic half empty one, or the more successful half full one?

Believe it or not, the way you think about things and view them can either take away from your power to accomplish and succeed, or give you the strength and conviction and power to do more good for yourself and others. This is not theory, but a fact of life. Your choice is how you want to utilize this universal law, but remember the law applies to everyone.

If you’re like most people, it’s easier to be optimistic and happy with some aspects of your life and not others. Likewise you probably have other aspects of your life that are influenced by a more pessimistic viewpoint. Let’s start with this presumption and move on to some recommendations. First do a review or an inventory of your life and identify the aspects that are either on the positive side or the negative side. Then strive to keep what you have that is good and beneficial and helpful to both you and others. Maintain control over yourself and all environmental influences you can to sustain these positive things in your life. Now using your strengths and good characteristics as a base to rely on, slowly but surely began to attack the weaker and more negative and pessimistic aspects of your life. Each small thing overcome or left behind represents a victory for the “half full” side of your life and a defeat for the “half empty” side of your life. In other words, you are gaining personal power and with increased power you have more capability to work on the remaining aspects of your life. With time and effort your cup ultimately becomes more than half full and half empty. It can become 60% full and 40% empty. Over the years it can become 70% full and 30% empty. With enough time, effort, self-discipline, wise decisions, and the utilization of opportunities, your cup can become full and its contents can run over and benefit or bless not only yourself, but those who interact with you or whose lives can be affected by you in some way.

I challenge you during this Thanksgiving season to remember its purpose. Be grateful and humble and enjoy this special time of the year. Make a commitment that your cup will become more full and less empty, that your life will become better not worse. You will strive to become happier and more optimistic, despite the reality of life that not everything is under your control and there are simply things you won’t be able to avoid. But as you do live your life in the future, you can learn from the past and do better.

Enjoy all the Thanksgiving activities with your family members, friends, and associates. Let these activities be wholesome and edifying to all persons involved. In your personal life, set aside some time to reflect upon the ideas in this article and utilize them in your life. If you do this, your enjoyment of Thanksgiving next year will be even better than this year.

YOUR OPINION – Let us know if you liked this article, and whether you agree or disagree with it? Provide your comments here . This is from my husband’s newsletter 2008. I hope you enjoy it as much as people did then. Colleen

Sharing With A Grateful Attitude

Sharing With A Grateful Attitude

When I was growing up my Mother had a framed Norman Rockwell picture that hung in her kitchen. She had cut it from a Saturday Evening Post magazine in 1943, when she married my Dad. That picture always held a special spot in my heart. The Grandfather standing so proudly, as Grandmother set the turkey on the table, and the family looking on in anticipation. It seemed to draw me into that happy family gathering. As I got older, I learned that the name of this now famous Rockwell painting was entitled “Freedom From Want.” It carries a wonderful message during this month of Thanksgiving.

My parents were children during the great Depression. Many of the stories they told us centered around those hard times. My Great-Grandfather like many in his generation, had grown up on a farm in the Midwest. This meant when they moved into town, they still had a small chicken coop, a large garden, and a “spud cellar” to store canned goods and root crops in. To my parents this meant there may not be money, but there was food to eat.

When the depression hit, it was not uncommon to hear a knock at the back door and find someone asking for a hot meal. Many times my parents related that their meal would be decreased so their Mothers could take the person at the back door a plate of hot food. This was the way you taught your children to be thankful they had food on the table; as well as a way to help someone in need.

I thought of those times while celebrating Thanksgiving with my parents and siblings. I thought of the over full belly, and the nap after dinner which we enjoyed. There were days of leftovers. I thought how fortunate we were. We were not wealthy, but we were well cared for.

When I grew up and had my own family, I shared stories of what life was like for my parents, and their parents. I told my children about how each person has something to be thankful for in his or her life.

We live in a different time now. People have moved from farms into towns, and from small towns into cities. Most of us do not grow our own food any more, nor have a garden. Therefore, we do not appreciate the production of food and the bountiful harvest displayed in the local grocery store where we shop.

This social shift has another effect. People do not know one another as well. Families are smaller in size. Family members and friends have moved away from each other. Neighbors do not know one another. People seem more distant. Strangers are not trusted. The result is people have lost much of their social connection with one another. Their support system is weaker and less reliable. It is more difficult to ask someone for assistance.

As the economy and social structure have shifted, families are realizing that they need to re-evaluate what is really important. Some families and individuals are faring better than others. For people who appreciate what they have and have stayed more connected to others, it is not as difficult to extend their hand to others.

Today we have different ways of “opening the back door and handing a plate of our food to a stranger”. We can donate food to rescue missions and local food banks. We can help out at a crises center. We can go to a nursing home and read letters, or visit with the elderly. We can contact local volunteer organizations and give back to the community a small token of what we have received.

Another good example is the old fashioned Victory Garden. I have observed an increase in this activity. More cities and towns are allowing people who don’t have the space for a garden, to use city property. I have been to Boston where some areas have been planting their gardens since the depression. This is a great way for communities and groups of people to work together. It increases our sense of gratitude and thankfulness for the blessings we have been given.

Close to my home there is a church which has set aside a large garden area. It has the space for about thirty families. In taking a walk, I often pass by this location and see the variety of foods being raised. People work along side one another and share ideas about gardening. They grow closer to each other and come to appreciate the bounties of the earth.. This is truly a good experience for all involved.

I hope you take the time to look around you at all the things you have. I hope you’re grateful for the good meals you eat. I hope you enjoy the crisp walks on a colorful fall day. I hope you appreciate the smiles you receive from others and give smiles back in return. I hope you find the time to do something for those around you. Just something to think about. Until later… Colleen

YOUR OPINION – Let us know if you liked this article, and whether you agree or disagree with it? Provide your comments here .

Sharing Is A Win-Win Strategy For Everyone

Things To Consider Today

This article was written by my husband, Leland Pulley.  I took it from the 11/2009  Newsletter we do together.  I have a link to the NEWSLETTER on the Homepage. Enjoy!

Sharing Is A Win-Win Strategy For Everyone

People need to open up to one another and share their thoughts and feelings. They can share their time and energy. When this is done, no one is left alone to do everything for himself. Individuals can draw upon their own resources, as well as the resources of others, to do what should be done in order to meet individual or group needs.

First consider the tremendous amount of help and assistance that you can receive from others. You have concerns and problems, as well as burdens you’re carrying. There are challenges facing you and goals to meet. With the help and encouragement of others, you’re far more likely to address these things in an acceptable manner and be victorious in the end. You will be able to think and act smarter, and achieve more. You will address your concerns, and solve your problems. Your burdens will be lighter. You will meet the challenges facing you. You will be more successful in reaching your goals.

Just as others can help you, you can help them. By giving of yourself to others, you not only help them, but help yourself in the process. You learn and grow mentally and spiritually. You become a better person. This occurs whenever service is rendered with the right attitude and in an appropriate way.

In a similar way people can share their happy occasions and moments of joy. This is appreciated by all of us. People can share their hopes and dreams. You can help them reach for these things and obtain them. Such success stories offer encouragement to everyone involved. Conversely others can do these same things for you.

One of the main reasons that sharing works is because it is spiritual in nature. It involves giving of yourself to help others. It strengthens relationships and increases love.

Another reason sharing works is because it involves teamwork. Others can think of things you cannot. They have knowledge and skills you don’t have. More than one person working on anything produces more results than working alone, assuming there is good communication and cooperation between all persons involved.

Sharing depends upon humility. You must face reality and be honest with yourself. If you have a problem, admit it. If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. This allows you to open up and admit others into your life. They can then help you address the issue or concern that you have.

Sometimes people will keep secrets because they don’t want others to know the full truth about them. They may be embarrassed or feel guilty. In the long run this only works against you. First it gives a false impression to others about you. It allows you to rationalize and try to justify what you’re doing, when you’re not really justified. It blocks you from sharing what you should and getting the help you need. Secrets don’t help you to face the truth and find solutions.

Another thing associated with sharing is pride. Not only do people not want to admit their mistakes and weaknesses, but they don’t want to ask for help. Their first response is to try to do everything for themselves. In some cases this works, but in many cases it doesn’t produce as good of results. In a few cases it leads to failure. Pride gives you a feeling of too much independence and a sense of false security. Then when something serious does occur, you find out that you don’t have the strength to solve the issue alone. Beside this, you now lack friends or a support group to help you. Under these conditions, who is even going to know that you need help? And if so, who is going to feel sorry for you or be empathetic? Who is going to step in and help you? The answer is usually no one.

It is so easy today for many people to get wrapped up in their own concerns amid their busy schedules and important personal priorities. It is hard to get them to think more about others and what they can do to help another person. This is one of the main reasons there is a lack of ties between so many people in society. There are not enough good friendships, nor good neighbors. Extended families hardly know one another, and even in the immediate family there can be strife and lack of teamwork. Sharing should be a personal value and get its share of time and effort in our lives.

We all benefit from mutual sharing. We get to know one another better and develop stronger relationships. We love more and are loved in return. We learn more from each other and solve problems easier. We are able to share both the good times and the bad times. As each of us walk down the road of our individual lives, we make more progress when there is sharing between us, and we are happier alone the way. It is a win-win strategy for everyone.

Consider the last time you shared something with another person. How much do others share with you, and what do they share with you? As you ponder these things, several experiences should come to your mind. Examine them carefully and they’ll reveal a lot about you. Are you or are you not a sharing individual? If you aren’t, change your ways and become more of a sharing person in the future. You will never regret this type of positive change in your life. Others who are influence by you will be grateful for it too.

YOUR OPINION – Let us know if you liked this article, and whether you agree or disagree with it. Provide your comments here.

This is an article my husband Leland wrote for his regular publication. It it just as important for you to hear as well. If you want to make a comment, sent it to lelandpulleycompany.com

Appreciation For What You Have In Life

Appreciation For What You Have In Life

I was talking with a young man the other day. He was cynical way beyond his mere nineteen years. He stood looking at me defiantly, as I asked him if he wanted to hold his son, Benjamin. His hands dug deeper into his baggy jeans pockets, and he shook his head “No”.

There were two friends who had come with Dad. I had ridden up the elevator with them, as an anonymous unknown. I listened to their snickered comments about what Daddy’s present pregnant girl friend was going to think when she found out. One poked Dad and in a joking way said’ “Yeah, but if one gives you crap, you can always go to the other to get a little honey. You know, play it. man.” At that point I exited the elevator.

The elevator doors closed and I knew that somewhere on the next floor up, some young fifteen year old, who didn’t have a clue what being a Mother entailed, had just joined the ranks of that oldest of callings. I felt disheartened to think of what the end results were going to be for this family group.

The elevator experience was the first encounter I had with this family.

Once I got to the intensive care unit I was introduced to the youngest member of this “family”, a cute little fellow with thick curly hair, swaddled tightly, to keep him from scratching his eyes out, screeching at the top of his lungs. His nurse had just given him his dose of morphine, and it would be about twenty minutes before he would get some relief for the withdrawals he was going through.

If my encounter in the elevator was disheartening, meeting Mom took my spirits down a few levels lower. At fifteen, Mom had advanced in her drug career at an above average rate. From “huffing” inhalants, “Sniffing” glue, smoking pot, using heroin and when she couldn’t afford that resorting to cheap, and easy to get meth. She’d had her first STD by the time she was thirteen. Her first abortion by fourteen, done her first trick for drugs a week before her fourteenth birthday, and had finally arrived here, looking at her first child going through withdrawals.

Trying to remain professional and non judgmental is not easy, even if you have been in nursing as long as I have. Yes, there is anger at the mother. Anger at the Father. Anger at the drug dealer. Anger at the Drug cartel. Anger at a system that is so accommodating to a parent that brings an innocent Benjamin into the world as a drug baby.

A few months after Benjamin went home with his parents, we learned that he died in a fire. His parents had set the fire while they were high on drugs. Anger and bitterness is what was felt when they were charged with negligent homicide instead of murder in the first degree. They didn’t get life, they got prison for three to five years, then they’d be up for parole. Life just doesn’t seem fair, does it?

So, when you get the urge to think life is REALLY overwhelming, think of little Benjamin. Most of us never realize just how much we have to be grateful for in our own lives. We walk through life and enjoy our friends and family. We watch the changing of the seasons. We are given much, and we can give much.

My last words are these, embrace every moment you have, and don’t ever forget the debt of gratitude you owe for the life you have. Just something to think about. Until later…Colleen

YOUR OPINION – Let us know if you liked this article, and whether you agree or disagree with it. Provide your comments here. This is an article I provided from my Husband’s newsletter site @ lelandpulleycompany.com. Stop by and see some of the regular articles provided. Remember, If you have any questions, dont forget to drop a note. Colleen